Love, Marriage, and Family in Jewish Law and Tradition

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Februar 1996



This book provides a detailed look at the traditional Jewish view of marriage, love, and sex, and a description of the Jewish wedding.


Foreword by Rabbi Nachman Bulman Acknowledgments Introduction Jewish Values for Our Time
Part I DECIDING ON MARRIAGE I. Marriage: A Jewish Duty Procreation, the Fundamental Biblical Command God's Partner in Creation The Marital State: The Norm of Jewish Life A MaleIs Not a Man A State of Wholeness Marriage as Optimal for the Woman Fulfillment through Marriage The Single State as the Selfish State Judaism and the Single Man 2. Whom one may - And May Not - Marry Judaism's Marriage Taboos What's Wrong with Intermarriage? "Liberalized" Marriages, Divorces, Conversions A Deepening Division within the Jewish Community Nonhalachic Conversions Nonhalachic Divorces The Mamzer Marriage and Divorce - For the Specialists Marriages Forbidden to a Man by Jewish Law Marriages Forbidden to a Woman by Jewish Law Marriages Permitted to a Man among His Relatives Marriages Permitted to a Woman among Her Relatives 3. Choosing the Right Mate The Big Gamble: Society's Guide for Finding a Marriage Partner Making a Good Match: Like Splitting the Red Sea Career versus Early Marriage Beginning the Search A Woman of Valor The Place of Beauty The Importance of Religious Observance How Important is the Partner's Family? Looking at Close Relatives The Quiet Family Three Vital Traits in a Mate What about the Convert? Hesed in a Woman In the Footsteps of the Matriarchs Why Modesty is Desirable Torah Study: How Essential Is It? The Desirable Son-in-Law A Scholarly Match Why Not Marry for Money? The Charm that Captivates The Wise and Worthy Wife Age Difference Comparative Accomplishments The Asset of Charitableness Avoiding Certain Negative Traits Too Much Talk The Quality of Truth Frugality and Indulgence Avoid the Worrier What Kind of Partner Will He/She Make? Predicting His/Her Future Behavior In Times of Crises and Joy Self-Esteem - A Desirable Trait Derech Eretz - A Composite Personality Trait The Traditional Jewish Way to Meet a Mate The Shadchan as Catalyst A Jewish Mating System that Works Nurturing Genuine Affection The Most Important Decision of a Lifetime
Part II LOVE 4. The Jewish Idea of Love Love as the Jewish Formula for Peace Love as the Basis of the Torah Different Expressions of Love The Supreme Virtue - Love of God Man Loves God Best When He Loves His Fellow Best God's Image Love is More Than an Emotion Putting Hesed into Practice The Nature of Romantic Love The Source of Popular Ideas on Love Romantic Literature: The Celebration of Illicit Love Idealization: Transforming Desire into Love Self-Love: The Basis of Romantic Love The Impermanence of Romantic Love How to Create an Enduring Love The Components of Ideal Love Loving Your Spouse as Yourself The Oneness of Love How to Have a Happy Marriage Giving, the Key to a Successful Marriage Why Marriages Fail - And How to Do Something about It True Love: More Than Yesterday, Less Than Tomorrow
Part III THE JEWISH APPROACH TO SEX 5. Judaism and Spirituality Harmonizing the Spiritual and the Biological The Jewish Idea - To Sanctify Everyday Life Attaining Holiness through Proper Behavior Abjuring Illicit Relations: Sanctifying Licit Ones The Reward for Moral Sexual Behavior Conjugal Relations - Sacred When Pure Human Oneness as the Way to Attain Unity with God Use of the Term "Knowledge" in the Torah Knowledge as a Metaphor for Understanding God Sexual Imagery in the Bible Bride and Groom: Allegorical Symbols for Israel and God Israel's Betrothal to the Torah The Marriage Allegory in Sacred Jewish Institutions The Torah as a Guide for Practical Living 6. Jewish Sexual Ethics - From Animalization to Humanization The Mark of the Maker The Dual Nature of the Sexual Drive Humanization or Animalization Free Will, a Spiritual Imperative Avoiding Confrontations with Temptation Sex Before Marriage Depersonalization=Dehumanization Judaism and Homosexuality The Rare Incidence of Homosexuality among Jews in the Past The Mitzvah of Marital Relations "Sex=Sin" Equals Neurosis
Part IV PLANNING THE NUPTIALS 7. Preparations for the Wedding The Engagement The T'na'im - Conditions of Engagement Setting the Date Where to Hold the Wedding Selecting the Rabbi The Marriage Document, the Ketubah The Husband's Guarantee toward His Wife The Antiquity of the Ketubah The Sanhedrin Ordains the Form of the Ketubah The Financial Obligations of the Ketubah Commissioning a Personalized Ketubah The Wedding Ring Wedding Apparel Music The Wedding Attendants The Week Before The Sabbath Preceding the Wedding The Wedding Day The Fast The Bride's Gift to Her Groom: A Tallit
Part V THE WEDDING 8. The Marriage Ceremony The Structure of the Marriage Service The Prenuptial Reception The Veiling Ceremony Preparing for the Hupah The Hupah The Wedding Procession Erusin - The Prenuptial Blessing Kidushin Witnesses The Recitation of the Marriage Formula The Presentation of the Ring The Reading and Presentation of the Ketubah The Seven Blessings The Meaning of the Blessings Breaking the Glass The Seclusion Room The Festive Wedding Meal Grace After the Meal The Week after the Wedding
Part VI THE MARRIED STATE 9. Family Policy: The Jewish Refinement of Sexuality The Nidah Laws Holiness and Sexuality: The Institution of Mikvah A Concern for the Woman and for the Marriage The Period of "Loving Friends" The Value to Marriage of Periodic Abstinence The Hedge of Roses Bride and Groom Once Again Preventing the Wife from Becoming a Sex Object The Sanctity of Time The Medical Benefits Nidah and Hygiene Purification versus Cleanliness Mikvah and its Priority in Judaism 10. Conjugal Relations: Privileges and Duties "And He Shall Cause His Wife to Rejoice" Applying Courtesy to Privileges Preventing Conjugal Neglect The Woman's Conjugal Rights Emotional Commitment A Concern for Women's Sexuality The Essential Preliminaries The Quality of the Act Mutual Pleasure: The Cosmic Plan Advocating Moderation The Imbalance in Favor of the Women Communicating Love and Peace 11. The Woman's Right in Marriage Marriage: A Legal Contract The Husband's Ten Obligations The Ketubah, a Charter of Women's Rights Divorce Divorce by Mutual Consent When the Husband May Compel Divorce When the Wife May Compel Divorce 12. Making a Marriage Work Sh'lom Bayit - A Vital Goal The Peaceful Home and the Peaceful Nation A Division of Roles The Jewish Wife - The Source of all Good in the Home The Jewish Husband - His Responsibility to Provide Making a Wife Happy Adorning Herself - A Woman's Obligation Take a Wife's Counsel Economic Problems in a Marriage Friendship - The Core of a Good Marriage The Danger of Anger in a Marriage Handling Anger through Self-Restraint The Art of Avoiding Quarrels The Obligation of Mutual Courtesy The Little Things that Count A Woman's Need for Outside Interests The Dual Obligation of Sh'lom Bayit The Rules for a Successful Marriage The Value of Peace Reconciling Couples The Home as a Temple
Part VII THE JEWISH FAMILY 13. The Jewish Home and Raising Children Family: The Medium for Jewish Survival Marriage and Family: Primary Torah Commands A Child-Centered Judaism The Home as the Prime Educator When to Begin Jewish Education Honoring Parents: The Child's Primary Duty The Required Extent of Filial Reverence How to Teach Children to Honor Parents When to Disobey Parents Good Parenting and Eternity What Makes a Happy Home? How to Discipline a Child Rules for Maintaining Discipline Being Positive and Consistent Tempering Discipline with Love How to Build a Close Relationship with Children Parents as Role Models Teaching Children Good Manners The Influence of the Sabbath The Weekly Sabbath Meals The Golden Rule in the Home Opportunities for Family Discussion Sabbath as the Climax of Family Living "And You Shall Teach Them Diligently to Your Children" Education in Jewish Schools Art, Music, and Sports for the Child Common Mistakes Jewish Parents Make "Where Did We Go Wrong" Intermarriage - The Ultimate Break Deciding Where to Live The Jewish Home: Role Model to the World Afterword Notes Glossary Bibliography of Selected Hebrew Sources Bibliography of Selected English Sources Index


Michael Kaufman
EAN: 9781568218847
ISBN: 1568218842
Untertitel: Sprache: Englisch.
Erscheinungsdatum: Februar 1996
Seitenanzahl: 416 Seiten
Format: kartoniert
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